I will try to save up to 20% of my income on a consistent basis this year. I definitely have to pass my school exam and office promotion interview too.
While I’m at it i should probably drop a few pounds as well. Come to think of it, it wouldn’t be a bad idea if I get into a relationship that’s actually heading towards the altar this time…
But these are the same commitments and determinations I made last year, and two years ago as well. Do I have the ability to accomplish it this time? Do I possess the self discipline and will power to achieve it this time? Have I acquired the necessary skills and built up my character enough to finally hit my target?
Maybe I shouldn’t even bother.
Afterall, I am not the worst person. And what will people say if I make the attempt and fail? Ahhh, let me just maintain my level abeg.
Self-doubt is lack of confidence or faith in a person’s actions, decisions, work, abilities, etc. We have all been a victims of self-doubt ranging from successful business people to those still coming up. A little bit of self doubt is both normal and healthy but it should not stop you from attaining the heights and achieving your set goals.
We have all made decisions at some point and doubt those choices simply because we feel that they are not good enough.
Self-doubt can lead to anxiety and depression, which can be detrimental to your physical health. It causes problems like tiredness, weight gain, high blood pressure. Self-doubt can hinder us from living our best life and achieving our set goals. Therefore, it is important to learn more about it and be aware of the problems they cause and find suitable ways to overcome them in order to live a satisfied life.
SOME CAUSES OF SELF DOUBT.
- Past experiences and mistakes
- Comparing yourself with others
- Lack of self confidence
- Fear of failure
- Inability to accept change.
WAYS TO OVERCOME SELF DOUBT
1. Try to Live in the Present Moment
Living in the present moment means you no longer worry about what happened in the past nor be afraid of what will happen in the future.
Most times we live in the past. We judge our future or present successes based on our past experiences or failures. Our past experiences are supposed to be lessons we learn from to help shape us to be better. Be in the present. If you are thinking of your past mistakes, it should be you trying to figure out a way to correct them or prevent them from reoccurring. DON’T DWELL ON THEM.
Every day should be a new start and a new slate to go for what you really want.
2. Believe in Yourself
A lot of times we look down on ourselves. We make great decisions and come up with unique ideas but then doubt kicks in and we begin to question all these great decisions. We have to learn to trust ourselves and our instinct. What ever you set your mind to achieve, if you put in the work and proper planning, you will get it done. Try not to be your own enemy, rather, learn to celebrate yourself and compliment yourself. Silence the voice of negativity immediately it arises.
“Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievement.” –Golda Meir.
3. Work with like-minded people
Work with people that will inspire you, push you to become better, see the good in you and criticize you in order to put you on track. Do not work with dream killers who never believe anything is possible. Friends and family are a reliable source of encouragement and strength. Those we usually spend time with, can have a huge effect on us. As the saying goes “iron sharpens iron”.
Research has shown that social support (that is, friends and family) have a favorable impact on the maintenance of health and on coping with illnesses. This is usually related to an individual’s personality, stress, coping skills and the pathogenic process. Also, the research shows that people with fewer friends tend to die sooner after having a heart attack than people with a strong social network. Having lots of friends may even reduce your chance of catching a cold .
Another research showed that social support may lower genetic and environmental vulnerabilities and enable resilience to stress.
“Find a group of people who challenge and inspire you; spend a lot of time with them, and it will change your life.” — Amy Poehler
4. Ask for help if you need one:
First, let me establish that asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It helps with growth and upgrade. In our world today, its very easy to decide to do things on our own but most times we will need opinions from external sources like your colleagues, mentors, coaches, friends, family, or even strangers we meet can give you an idea that could be life transforming.
It’s good to work alone, yes but seek help and support once you think your own ideas are not forthcoming or are not good enough. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.
“You can do anything but not everything.” – David Allen
5. Stop Making Excuses
When ever self doubt kicks in we begin to make excuses. Excuses make us rationalize things, giving us good and tangible reasons why we shouldn’t do them. The distance between where you are right now and where you really want to be can be measured by the number of excuses you make and take. We have missed a lot of great opportunities most of which were as a result of excuses and fears that were not valid.
Yes, most times we are afraid to start because of the fear of failure and so we create excuses as to why it will not work.
Recent research has emphasized the fact that excuses are made to protect ourselves from the implications of failures and transgressions.
“Excuses are merely nails used to build a house of failure”. American Proverbs
In conclusion, believing in your self will help you stand tall. Mute those inner voices of discouragement and keep pushing!!!
Ozbay, F., Johnson, D., Dimoulas, E., Morgan, C., Charney, D., & Southwick, S. (2007, May). Social support and resilience to stress: From neurobiology to clinical practice. Retrieved April 08, 2021, from https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2921311/
Schlenker, B. R., Pontari, B. A., & Christopher, A. N. (2001). Excuses and character: Personal and social implications of excuses. Personality and Social Psychology Review, 5(1), 15-32. doi:10.1207/s15327957pspr0501_2
Schwarzer, R., & Leppin, A. (1991). Social support and Health: A theoretical and Empirical Overview. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 8(1), 99-127. doi:10.1177/0265407591081005
Valeo, T. (2017, April 16). Good friends are good for you. Retrieved April 08, 2021, from https://www.webmd.com/healthy-aging/guide/good-friends-are-good-for-you#1